When you feel stressed, anxious, panic or otherwise disturbed, you take self-sabotaging thoughts especially close to heart. They feel as if true then, confirming the view that is already built in your head about you and about the world around. This negative self-talk is actually a symptom of stress, activation of fight or flight response, your urge to just disappear, to fly from the danger.
The problem is, when you engage in this negative self-talk dialog, you usually do not try to argue with this view. You confirm it, and next negative thoughts follow. You start screening your mind for the past events which can confirm your view, putting more blame on, more shame, and fell more pain. Instead of fighting the stress, you aggravate it more.
You should remember that thoughts are transient and that they are not the facts. Thoughts are thoughts, and you are not your thoughts. It takes some time before you start seeing this, but just becoming aware of this fact can change the way you react to negative self-talk. Next time you notice it begins, you don’t jump in with self-judgment. You are just becoming aware, “Oh, here it is, new passengers arrived with negative self-talk passports. It is fine, I’ll let them go”.